Ignorance is bliss

So August has finally arrived - the month of THE first foot appointment. I currently feel quite anxious and nervous about the whole thing. I quite like everything as it is, I'm used to his foot - in fact I saw a baby with two feet and I surprised myself by thinking that having two baby feet was strange. I'd forgotten what two tiny baby feet had looked liked.

I am quite enjoying being as we are, nothing needs doing and I'm living in ignorant bliss that anything NEEDS to be done. Obviously they could say exactly that at the appointment, but I kind of feel like I need to think he needs loads of operations, then even if they say he needs one when he is 30 years old I am still prepared! Sounds so outrageous being worried about that, but I guess thats being a parent, you worry about some of the most obscure things and then try and rationalise it. 

I keep flitting between feeling guilty that I feel as I do. Especially when plenty of other families have been through so much worse, and have to deal with a lot more on a daily basis. I guess for me, this is what I know and my situation. For someone else that might be how they feel about their own individual circumstances, whether its a missing toe or a missing leg. One thing I have to thank instagram for is seeing other families daily lives, I have been following families with limb differences, other physical disabilities, leg problems, developmental problems, and I must admit I am in awe of how honest and raw some of what they share is. It helps me to see they can make lift of a bad day, or what aids they have been given to help with something so simple - one day I follow put up a picture of an arm adaption for her little ones bike - I mean how amazing! Things like that just make me smile and drag me out of a silly 'but what if' mood. 

Mr. N is now 4 months old and is doing everything he should be, he's trying to roll, doing better at tummy time, can support his head quite well, he smiles a lot, giggles, babbles and reaches out to play with his play mat toys - guiltily he does love watching a bit of telly, but if it means I can drink my drink and not have to hold a child I am all for it. 

We are still breastfeeding and it is going really well still, I always thought I would combi feed but it turns out I am far to lazy to make a bottle up, when I can just whip a boob out without any preparation. I am over the moon it has worked for us this time, but I must admit the lack of clothing is a little bit annoying, having to think about what sort of access my tops have is a bit of a pain. I have been recommended a facebook group called 'Can I breast feed in it?' which is amazing. There are a lot of ladies who share tops, dresses, jumpsuits etc that they have found easy to feed in. I just haven't been brave enough to buy anything yet as my body has changed so much ... but honestly if thats all I have to moan about, ill take it.

Keep an eye out for a few different blog posts coming out, I have got a few lovely individuals involved in sharing their limb difference stories, which I can not wait to share.